Is there enough?

Our adoption journey has given me the opportunity to meet so many, like-minded people. One family adopted 6 older children. Children who had been in the care center the longest at that time. Older, for adoption purposes is usually 3 & up.

One of her sons, asks nearly every day, "Is there enough food, or should I share mine?" They been home quite a while, and yet, he still asks. For some reason, this just grieved my heart. Children should be able to be children, not worry about whether there is enough food. Children shouldn't have to be given up by their mother, because she can't feed them.

We're so blessed in the States to have the social network that provides for those in need. Truly, kids in the states should never starve to death. A parent does not need to choose between life & death in that way.

On a different note...

On Saturday, Kebrom was helping Paul cut out a cover for the bbq out of heavy plastic. He knew that it needed to be pulled tight in order for the cutting to go well. How did he know that? Sometime, in his life before us, he learned that. Did he do a similar job with father by birth, the one that died last summer? My heart ached for the portion of Kebrom's life we've missed; and, my heart ached for the things I know their mother, by birth, will also miss.

When I help Atsede put in her earrings, I wonder what was the day like when she got them pierced? Was it a momentous occasion? Was it a right of passage for her age? Does she even remember it?

We've seen some regression on Kebrom's part. He's begun wetting the bed at night. But, he allows himself to be helped. No longer is he our tiny 3 year old taking care of himself. He seems to realize we are here to take care of him. Atsede still seems to be struggling. She feels, to me, like a child who wishes she was someplace else. They each have nightmares...I wonder what they dream. Kebrom wakes up & crawls into bed with Paul. He lays there, eyes closed seemingly asleep, rubbing his tiny hands all over Paul's face & arms, as if to assure himself Paul is still there.

We may never know what they dream about. But somewhere, there is a mom on the other side of the planet, who is also wondering, and dreaming about what they will become.

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